Why boredom is important for children

In a world full of distractions and constant activity, boredom is often frowned upon in children. Many parents and educators tend to fill their children's time with activities, games, and educational programs to ensure that they are always busy and stimulated. However, psychological research and experts repeatedly emphasize that boredom is of great importance for child development. It not only promotes creativity and independence but also gives children the space to discover themselves.

As a mother, I rarely experience boredom. Between work, everyday responsibilities, caring for my children, and the many small and large tasks that arise every day, it is almost a luxury to simply do nothing. When it does happen, I enjoy the moments when I just stare into space without a clear thought in my head – a welcome break. For my children, however, it looks quite different. Here I had to learn to endure boredom, both for myself and for them. 

It is tempting to quickly put a screen in front of the children in such moments or to overwhelm them with a multitude of suggestions for what they could do. But I have found that this is not always the right way. When my children call out, "Mom, I'm bored!!!", I now simply say: "Yes, you are bored." Because I have learned that enduring boredom and dealing with it is a valuable skill – a skill that children have to learn first.

Boredom forces them to become creative, find their own solutions, and reflect on themselves. And even though it is sometimes difficult for me as a mother not to intervene immediately, I have realized how important it is to give them this space. Enduring boredom is something that must be learned – and that applies not only to children.

"And then you also have to have the time to just sit there and stare into space." - Astrid Lindgren

Boredom promotes creativity

One of the most important aspects of boredom is its role as a catalyst for creativity. When children are bored, they have the opportunity to let their imagination run wild and develop new ideas. Without pre-made activities or entertainment, they have to look for solutions themselves to fill their time.

British psychologist Dr. Sandi Mann, author of *The Upside of Downtime: Why Boredom is Good*, explains:  "Boredom is the starting point for creativity. When we are bored, we look for stimulation – and that promotes imagination."  

When children are bored, they often begin to invent their own games or immerse themselves in imaginative worlds. This time of free play is crucial for the development of problem-solving skills and the ability to think independently.

Boredom strengthens independence

Children who are allowed to be bored regularly learn to take responsibility for their own entertainment. Instead of relying on adults or external stimuli, they develop strategies for how they can entertain themselves. This promotes not only independence but also the ability to make decisions.

Psychologists emphasize that it is important for children to experience a sense of autonomy in a controlled environment. Dr. Teresa Belton, a researcher who studies boredom and its importance, emphasizes:  "Boredom forces children to find their inner drive and set their own course, instead of waiting for external instructions." Children who experience boredom learn how they can make good use of their own time, which is also beneficial later in life.

Boredom promotes emotional intelligence

In addition to promoting creativity and independence, boredom also offers a valuable opportunity to strengthen emotional intelligence. Children who are bored often have to deal with their own feelings – frustration, impatience, or restlessness. This teaches them to recognize and regulate their emotions. By learning to tolerate boredom and use it productively, children develop a better tolerance for frustration. They learn that unpleasant feelings pass and that they have control over their reaction to these feelings. This ability to regulate emotions is a key skill for adult life.

Space for self-discovery

Boredom creates space for self-reflection and personal development. Children who are constantly busy rarely have the opportunity to think about their own desires, interests, and thoughts. During times of boredom, they can get to know themselves better and discover their own passions and talents.

The well-known child psychologist David Elkind said about this:  

"Children need time to discover who they are and what they are really interested in. Boredom is often the beginning of this discovery process.”

This free space allows children to find out what really drives them and what brings them joy, independent of external influences.

Less is sometimes more: The pressure of overstimulation

In today's society, children are often overstimulated by constant stimuli and activities. Screens, toys, organized activities – all of this contributes to children having little room for boredom. But this abundance of stimuli can lead to overwhelm and impair the ability to entertain oneself independently.

Dr. Kim John Payne, another expert in this field, argues in his book ‘Simplicity Parenting’ that children need not only fewer material things but also fewer structured activities to find their inner balance.  

"A child needs space and time to create their own world, and boredom is the breeding ground for this inner world," says Payne.

We have had really great experiences with boredom. Especially on long car rides, I find it fascinating to watch my child deal with their boredom. Sometimes it leads to a deep and restful sleep, sometimes surprising insights about the world emerge, and every now and then, wonderful stories and imaginative adventures are born in their head. These moments show me again and again how valuable boredom is for child development. So my tip to you: Dare to allow and endure boredom – both for yourselves and for your children. It really is worth it!